How to Politely Remind Guests to RSVP

Every couple deals with this: late RSVPs, or guests who completely fail to respond to your invitation. For brides and grooms deep in the wedding planning process, it can be extremely frustrating to chase down your guest list for a “yes” or “no” answer to their invitation. 

Luckily, with so many channels of communication, from your wedding website to social media, many couples today use RSVP reminders to encourage guests to respond to their invitations. Still, there will always be a few guests who forget to RSVP on time. 

Use our RSVP reminder wording ideas to send messages to guests and ensure that you have a finalized guest list in time for the wedding. 

RSVPs are vital for couples planning their wedding, because in most cases the final number of guests will affect vendor costs, seating arrangements, and more. 

Most formal venues and caterers charge a cost per head or per plate. This means that you’ll need to get a final head count to your vendors before the big day so that there’s enough food and chairs for every guest in attendance.

Your final guest list will also affect your seating arrangements and corresponding displays, as well as any other personal touches at your wedding. 

If guests don’t RSVP in a timely manner, it can throw off a few different factors. Even worse, if someone fails to RSVP and shows up to your wedding, you may not have a seat for them!

Aside from planning details, most couples also just want to know who will be in attendance at their wedding! In the excitement leading up to the big day, it’s natural to want to know who will be there when you say “I do” and who must regretfully decline their invitation. 

Getting guests to RSVP on time can be difficult. It’s common for a few guests to simply forget and miss the deadline due to their own busy schedules. Most guests don’t ignore the RSVP deadline on purpose, so sending RSVP reminders can be helpful! 

Make it Clear on the Invitation

Before you worry about sending reminders, make sure it is clear on your invitation how and when guests should RSVP. When you’re creating your wedding invitations, figure out how you want to collect RSVPs and when they should be due. 

The traditional method is to include an RSVP card in the invitation, along with an envelope for guests to send it back. While this is a bit outdated and relies on the often slow mail system, many couples still choose this method.

More and more, however, couples are using online methods to collect RSVPs. You can use your wedding website, a dedicated email address, or even allow guests to RSVP over the phone. 

However you want to handle the responses to your invitations, make sure it is clear to guests how they should RSVP, and don’t forget to include a deadline. You can offer several options (mail, email, etc.) so that guests can choose the method that is easiest for them. 

 Ask for Meal Choices 

Another way to improve the response rate is to ask for guests to pick a meal. While some guests may forget to simply check “yes” or “no”, they are more likely to remember if their meal is on the line. 

If you are hosting a wedding reception with a traditional sit-down dinner, ask for meal choices on your RSVP cards so that guests are more likely to get their answers in on time!

Send Out Reminders 

Once you’ve set yourself up for success by sending invitations with clear instructions, you will still likely face a few late RSVPs. To ensure that all of your guests respond, don’t be afraid to send out reminders!

Online communication is a great way to send gentle reminders about RSVPing, even before the deadline has passed. 

If you have a wedding website, make sure your RSVP by date is listed clearly so that guests are reminded to respond. If possible, make an option on your website for guests to RSVP right there, so that they can see the reminder and RSVP on the spot. 

Many couples update their loved ones on the wedding planning process via email or social media posts. If this is your style, consider posting the occasional reminder to RSVP as the date approaches. You can share a post about booking your florist and sneak in a note about “3 weeks until RSVPs are due!” 

Once your RSVP by date has come and gone, you can more directly reach out and ask guests for an answer. 

RSVP Reminder Wording Examples

Use these templates to politely remind guests to RSVP to your wedding!

Reminders Before RSVPs are Due

If your RSVPs aren’t due quite yet, you can still politely try to remind guests to respond. We don’t recommend reaching out directly just yet – it may seem a bit pushy – but you can use your wedding website, social media, or even email if you send updates about your wedding to subtly remind guests to RSVP. 

At this point in your wedding timeline, gently remind guests their options to RSVP. Try this RSVP reminder wording on your social media post or wedding website update: 

We are so excited to get married and celebrate with friends and family! 

We want to remind guests that you can RSVP via our website, through the mail, or by contacting us at our shared email address, OurWedding@gmail.com. We can’t wait to see you all!

Another option could tie in with an update about your planning process, such as:

We just met with our caterer to finalize the menu at our wedding. With only 8 weeks until the big day, we’re so excited to share our joy with our loved ones!

Don’t forget to choose your meal for the wedding when you RSVP – it’s going to be tasty! If you have any questions about the wedding, feel free to reach out to us!

Reminders for the RSVP Deadline 

As the deadline for RSVPs approaches, you may only have half of your responses in. Don’t stress! Posting reminders or even sending them out to the whole guest list via email will help guests remember to RSVP in time. 

In the week or days leading up to your RSVP deadline, send or share a reminder such as: 

The big day is approaching fast..the day our RSVPs are due! Please let us know if you will be attending our wedding by March 10th.

You can RSVP by sending us your response card, via email, or on our website here! 

We can’t wait to celebrate with everyone! 

Another option:

Our wedding on June 5th keeps getting closer and closer, and we are so excited to celebrate with our friends and family!

This is just a friendly reminder that RSVPs are due one week from today, on March 10th. If you haven’t already, please let us know if you will be attending!

You can RSVP online on our website, via email, or by giving us a call. We can’t wait to see you all there!

While you may be getting antsy to have your guest list finalized, try to keep things upbeat and positive as you remind guests to RSVP! 

Reminders for Late RSVPs 

The wedding RSVP due date has come and gone, and there are still a handful of guests who haven’t given you an answer. This is a frustrating, but all too common, occurrence that every couple has to deal with. 

Once you are past the RSVP deadline, there’s no need to feel bashful about reaching out directly to anyone who has not responded. Don’t be rude or abrasive, but ask them directly if they’ll be attending! 

If you choose to send an email or text to someone who has not responded, consider this message wording: 

Hi Dan! We just wanted to make sure that you received the invitation to our wedding on June 5th. Our vendors need a final headcount, so please let me know if you can make it! 

We recommend calling guests on the phone once their RSVP is late, if you’re comfortable calling. Talking on the phone helps you to get an immediate response, while text or email leaves the chance that they could continue to not respond. 

If you do choose to call friends or family on the phone, be sure to be polite and ask how they’re doing before asking them for an answer. While it is surely frustrating to have to chase down your guest list for a response, they most likely just forgot. 

If you call and a guest still isn’t sure if they can attend, give them a hard deadline to meet – even as little as 24 hours. They are already late, and you need to finalize your guest list!