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should wedding bands match

Do Wedding Bands Have to Match?

Placing wedding bands on each other’s ring fingers is a tradition that dates back several centuries. In most cultures, the ring finger is usually the left hand’s third finger from the thumb. This is because it was once believed that there is a vein that ran directly to the heart from that particular finger.

While medicine and science corrected that misconception, the tradition lived on, and it is still upheld to date. Purchasing your wedding bands is quite an exciting part of your wedding process. But, do wedding bands have to match?

As the bride and groom begin to search for wedding bands, they may realize they have different style preferences. Should the bride and groom’s wedding bands match? Wedding etiquette changes all the time, so the answer is really up to you and your partner. 

matching wedding bands

Conventionally, having matching wedding bands is the way to go in most cultures. Matching wedding bands have been the standard practice for a long time. The idea behind the tradition follows:

  • It is an outward expression that conveys the message that you and your spouse have become one
  • It is a demonstration that you both have the same taste 
  • It is a sign that you both believe in traditions, including other marital traditions 

Matching wedding bands shows that you and your partner are united by your rings. Putting symbolism aside, however, there is an argument for mismatched wedding bands as well.

The Argument for Mismatched Wedding Bands

mismatched wedding bands

While it is important to keep traditions, sometimes it isn’t that serious. There is nothing wrong in bending the rules, even if it is just slightly. Having mismatching bands does have its own kind of beauty as well:

  • You get the chance to express your individuality
  • Having mismatching bands shows that your love is not governed by pressure, where one of you feels compelled to do something even if they do not like it
  • It allows both partners to make a choice that best complements their personal style. 

Some couples end up choosing different wedding bands that don’t match. This is totally fine, and you should not shy away from expressing your preference to your spouse. There are situations that call for mismatching wedding bands and below are some of them.

A particular set of matching bands may not work for you as a couple. A given style could end up looking too overwhelming for one partner, or too dainty for the other. Perhaps the grooms choice does not match the bride’s engagement ring style.  In this case, you do not have to force a piece of jewelry on one another. Just talk to your jeweler to adjust your ring of choice to something that you are both one hundred percent comfortable with. 

In case you cannot seem to agree on getting matching sets, complementary rings are a perfect solution. There are several options to play around with in this scenario. You could get differently-styled bands, but of the same metal or go for different metals but same style. 

Factors To Consider

Just like honeymoon destinations and wedding cakes, when it comes to wedding bands, different couples love different things. It is paramount that you both end up loving your wedding bands, as it is something that you will wear daily for an entire lifetime, whether or not they match. If you are not sure exactly where you stand on wedding bands, be sure to consider the following:

The Metal

When it comes to wedding jewelry, gold is the color of choice traditionally. However, as things evolve, so have traditions. Today, platinum seems to be making a big entry into the scene. Other metals that make perfect choices, especially for men, include tungsten and titanium. Some people experience skin sensitivities, in which case hypoallergenic metals would be their ideal choice.


wedding bands

While yellow gold is the natural choice traditionally, there is nothing wrong with picking a different color. If your taste is inclined to the contemporary side, white or rose gold is perfect for many brides. Black titanium or gray tungsten is quite a complementary choice for grooms.

Design and finish

There are many designs to wedding bands, ranging from contemporary to traditional and everything else in between. Here, you are allowed to be fully expressive. Choose a design that best portrays your personal style.

A polished finish can be quite reflective. However, a satin or matte finish can be subtle and classy. Additionally, this kind of finish does not show scratches conspicuously. 

Diamonds or Gemstones?

gemstone wedding bands

What accents do you prefer? Is it colored gems or diamonds? This is something that you want to consider before heading down to the jewelry store. 

When it comes to wedding bands, there are many variations as to what should and should not happen. For instance, it wasn’t until the 20th century that double-bands (where both the bride and groom got a ring each) became common practice.

Here, we believe in breaking the rules just a little. Choose wedding bands that make you and your spouse happy, regardless of whether or not they match. All the wedding related choices that you have to make should reflect who you are as a couple. You can choose to have matching bands, different bands, or even complementary bands. Whatever decision you make, feel free to be yourself.

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